Do you allow disappointment to be disappointing?
We have all experienced disappointment.
Sometimes life just doesn’t work out the way we want and immediately we experience the emotion, disappointment. It can feel as though we have been punched in the stomach. Thankfully, disappointment is an emotion. Which means that it can leave just as fast as it came. Emotions are messengers. They are designed to give you a message then LEAVE.
The problem is that many of us hold on to the emotion thus preventing it from leaving. Hence, your disappointment becomes disappointing.
There are three ways to make sure your disappointment comes and goes.
Stay in the present
The reason you experience disappointment when something doesn’t go your way is because you immediately look at tomorrow. You began thinking as if you have magical powers where you can predict the future. You create a future that hasn’t existed yet. To make matters worse, you continue the disappointing story by giving it your own disappointing ending.
You need to stay in the present moment! Accept the emotion of disappointment, make a decision to persevere, and move on. Remember that your disappointing event will have little to no effect on your overall destination.
The easiest way to get over disappointment is by taking action toward your goals. An emotion will alert you of changing road conditions. With that information you can decide to take the course or a detour. Whichever decision you make, take action as soon as possible. It is almost impossible to take action towards a goal and be disappointed at the same time. Therefore, take action quickly so disappointment won’t steal time away from you. It doesn’t have to be a type of action that gives immediate results. Just take one step towards a goal. The good news is that the action does not have to be towards the same goal.
Progress towards any goal will cause disappointment to leave. Let’s say you didn’t make the soccer team and you decide to try again next year. Even if you do not make any action towards improving your soccer skills, you can make progress towards another goal such as completing a novel or learning a new trick on your skateboard. Whatever it is, your mind just needs to make progress to feel good
Talk about it
Research shows that it takes longer to overcome disappointment when you deal with it alone instead of talking about it with others. It helps to remind you that it’s actually normal to experience disappointment. Everyone experiences disappointments and that’s okay (remember it’s an emotion. It’s supposed to come and go.). Another reason is that it gives you the opportunity to vent. Sometimes when you share your feelings aloud, it can feel like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders. When you are able to verbally share your feelings, then you no longer have to keep it inside.
Do not allow disappointing disappointments to stand in the way of your success!